The past often keep a bad memory that we wish to remove from the list of memories. Unfortunately not easily free ourselves from anger or resentment. Yet research shows most diseases come from anger to himself.
Anxiety, depression, anxiety, insomnia and physical illness is a bit of the disease had caused anger factor. By forgiving and say the word sorry, we actually had to take back control of our lives. Plus a positive bonus to health. One of them drop in blood pressure.
In a study of the Stanford-Ireland Hope Project, Frederic Luskin Thoresen Carld PhD and PhD doing research on the impact of forgiveness. In this study involved 17 men and women who once discharge members of murder victims. For some time the respondents are given training "forgive".
After a week, 35 percent of the respondents who lost spouses, children, parents or siblings were reported reduced headache disease. Likewise, the various stress-related illnesses other. Meanwhile, 20 percent of respondents claimed to reduce symptoms of depression.
Many people admit, gave the word apology is not an easy thing. However, there are 5 ways that we can use more sincere heart to forgive as described by Joan Borysenko, Ph.D., author of Inner Peace for Busy People.
1. learn to know purpose of forgiveness
In general, people do not want to forgive because they feel it is the same as other people said did not do wrong, or we make peace with someone who has hurt us.
Joan Borysenko, PhD, a psychologist, said the pardon was the thing about releasing anger that has been holding you. This is tantamount to accepting you are wrong and decide to free themselves from a painful thing.
2. Grief for the lost
So that we can genuinely forgive, we must feel sorrow. This takes time but once you decide to release the anger, the heart will feel lighter gradually. In time, the memory of past events are more often remembered and it was no longer painful.
3. Do not wait for an apology
Sometimes we find people who have hurt us do not realize what he did wrong. Or maybe they were not able to understand and empathize. An apology from these people are able to heal wounds, but decided to throw an apology hope there also have the same impact.
4. Trying to understand the reasons
The fact is, bad behavior is the result of a less mature emotion. This is evident from the majority of perpetrators of crime experienced physical or psychological violence in his childhood. Empathy will help us to erode the sense of anger, and even change our lives.
5. Welcome to come
Life is a school where we learn many things, including painful. We can not shy away from pain. But we can choose to get out of the shadows of our lifelong grudge.
Choosing to let go and move on will make you into a new individual. This will give you the maturity and compassion for others and also yourself.
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